Dont delay marriage by mufti menk biography

I know. We cry when we see the children of the good people sometimes people we know! And they come to us you know what. How could this have happened!!! You are still studying.

Dont delay marriage by mufti menk biography: Work hard on your

Allahu Akbar. May Allah forgive us. Brother and sister open your eyes. See what is going on. Ask the people what is happening. If you think we are not living in an era of hyper sexuality. You are dreaming. You are living in a dream world. We are living in the dirtiest society up to this age. There has never ever been, a more hyper sexual society that ours.

Believe me everything out there is about sex. And I am saying this because I have to fulfil my duty as a scholar of Islam. To explain to the people what is going on out there and how we are heading in the wrong direction. Because we are living with blinkers. Ask your children in the universities. If you have a good link with them they will inform you.

Ask them. Ask what is happening in the malls or in the shopping centers or at the work place. You can be the best and the most pious. Yes, if Allah has granted you protection. You will always be protected; May Allah grant us goodness. There are people amongst us and I would like to hope, That the bulk of us seated here pure good people by the will of Allah.

You know how difficult it is to remain on that path. You know how easy it is to sin. Today it is easier to sin than to abstain from it. It is easier to leave your Salaah, than it is to fulfil it. That is because the environment has made it so difficult to engage in that which is correct. But my brothers and sisters.

Dont delay marriage by mufti menk biography: They emphasize the importance

This is why I say do not delay Nikaah. And at the same time do not make it difficult in any way. We already spoke about the Mahr [The Dowry] or whatever else it is. Because in that particular case we will be held accountable in the eyes of Allah [SWT]. Why is that you as a parent did this to your own daughter? You doomed her. You punished her.

And this is what you did to your son. You made him leave the Deen in totality brings me to one example, Living example:. So his father told him:. What am I going to tell my friends and society, my brothers and my sisters? How can I help you? And the end of that is that they get married.

Dont delay marriage by mufti menk biography: Delaying marriage without a valid reason

So you have to take these steps. That's not the only way you can approach the uncles and Auntie's. You know, they are those uncles and Auntie's in society, that are well known to match people together, approach them, tell them I'm looking for marriage. And another barrier is that we think that people know what we are thinking. If you know anyone suitable then suggest.

So do your best. And Allah grant him goodness, my father always says do your best and to Allah, leave the rest, do your best, and to Allah, leave the rest. As for social media, and getting on to DMS, etc. I encourage you not to do this, I discourage you from doing this because you shouldn't slide you know, they call it sliding into the DMS.

Why are you sliding in the first place? You know, there's a negative connotation to that. On the like the from the management of the app, they are monitored. Those are safer options then going on to Instagram and sliding into someone's DM. So if you really must, then Bismillah use these apps and may Allah subhanahu wa taala make it easy for you.

This is a question that I've received many times and I keep receiving. So it's a very important question. Baraka Luffy is like, Well, can I add one quick thing? And I would prefer that you actually spoke to if it's a girl, you can speak to your folks to say, You know what, there's a brother at work. I don't I haven't even spoken to him, but he's really a suitable candidate.

Take him a bottle of perfume, and so on, and suss him out. And then you can pick up if he's really not what he is, you're going to do your research. The problem is when she's already developed a relationship with her. She wants me as a parent to come in and rubber stamp a guy who's on wheat Come on No ways. If there's guys who are interested in you?

If they're serious and sincere, they will have no no qualms in meeting your family in the parents? No, they won't for a moment hesitate. And the thinking is different. Everything you know, is I was gonna say weird, but I'm a guy. But if you're going to put your line and your barrier, they're going to respect you if they really serious out of or two might be serious.

Trust me the other 99 players sorry, Allah make it easy. Does a parent have a right to disagree with their choice of spouse of their son or daughter? I think Mufti just put it perfectly where he said, it's obviously the best to get the blessings of your parents, and obviously, anybody who's been married, even if you've run off with somebody, the love of your life, whatever it may be, there comes a time we two human beings living together, they grew up differently, they think differently, you're going to clash on a few different things.

Or should I have actually waited and gotten the dont delays marriage by mufti menk biography of my parents, I think it's important to put it well to say that try your best to involve the parents and get their blessing. You save a lot of headache later on. What would you like to add to that? Yeah, I agree with him. And if you're saying that, you know, do they have a right?

In the case of a girl. That's the whole idea of having a protection, you know, to say this, and I give you my daughter. Remember, when I've given my daughter's away, I've always said, Look, all I need you to do is please respect her and honor that's it. But all I always tell them is just learn to respect each other and honor each other.

That's it. I wouldn't like to see someone coming, screaming and abusing swearing my own daughter, it would hurt me, I gave you this child, you know, it's not for me. It's something that you've that would actually be a red line. May Allah Almighty make it easy for all of us. I mean, we this is a huge topic by itself. And we've got some questions on it.

And they said, give us some time. The girls in laws put pressure on her to the point she'd say something and then in the evening, she's like, No, no, no goes against it. And I remember speaking to her, this almost broke my heart. To be honest, I can say this. I asked her the question. I said, Do you have any complaints about your parents?

And the parents will ask and just wait one week over the one week, and they'll do the NIC card so they can announce it to that if they their relatives? She said no. And I asked, I said for 23 years of your life. They brought you up with love and kindness. And she said yes. I said they gave you 23 years, and you can't give them one week.

They were heartbroken. You know Murthy, like what would you say in this. And all it takes is a little bit of patience. I agree with you completely. I've been involved in similar matters for many, many years. And a lot of the times a few years into that marriage, there's a lot of regret, which they don't realize you need your families. However, there are some families where the folks are totally unreasonable, totally unreasonable, you know, they tribalistic races sometimes in those cases, I would, you know, relate to the people trying to get married.

But otherwise, don't. Don't treat that territory. It's not worth it. I mean, imagine you get married, you have a child, how excited are you? You don't know? May Allah make it easy. Amin, amin. So with the next question this it gets really technical at times of marriage handler The good news is there. Everything's been decided parents are happy on both sides.

Then comes the question. What is the matter? And how do you determine what it will be? What did I say? Look, I tell you, Mahara is a gift. He doesn't have to give it immediately he can give it later. And sometimes she can even waive it later on. It's not a selling price. It's not a buying price. It does not say much about who you are. So in wealthy communities, it would naturally be a little bit more depending on the order or the norm.

What success Do you want him to achieve in life? It's not something it's not a bride price, as they say. So usually, you look at what is known as Maharal mythen. That's a sunnah. Look at the girls of the same family. And what did they get? So when I got married, I paid pounds pounds model. I promise you pounds. And what have I given her from that time to now?

I don't even know the figure she doesn't. I don't think there is anything she's ever asked me for. That I haven't done. I'm just letting you know. And what did I pay? And I promise you, it's not because people say, Oh, this guy's as simple. Come, come, bro, let's show you. So all those who might be interested later on when you're a successful man, please understand they don't belong in your life.

That's all you dont delay marriage by mufti menk biography why they would never have sacrificed if they were put into your life 20 years earlier the way the one who's there has sacrificed you just need to understand this. And so therefore the amount given doesn't confirm whether you're going to be happier or not. So what do you want?

You're gonna say 50k Get a divorce another 50k Get another divorce before you know it I've got k Now I can go and marry properly whoever I want. It's not a business it's not that the idea is I'm gonna marry someone token amount what is it? It is like a down payment in my explanation to say from today onwards, I am responsible for all your expenses it's on me.

So from today onwards, this is the first amount if you ever need any money come to me and inshallah I'll try and you know, help you for as long as it's reasonable. That's what it is. I understand what they're trying to achieve, but then it's toxic. I'm entering into a slavery agreement. I mean, I can't get out of it. Because if I want to get out of it, I got to pay a million bucks and what they do, they run you into a HELOC and they run you into something disastrous, where if anything goes bad, they never ever give you the HELOC until you squeeze it out of them because they don't want to issue it they're going to have to pay you a million bucks.

So there's a lot of negativity in that let's go easy simple ways. And Allah make us inshallah successful in our marriages. I mean, yeah. Any advice for anyone finding it difficult to get married? Well, try to be chaste. Allah subhanahu totalis is well your staff even leadin Allah Ji doon Anika Han had you near whom Allah whom in fugly that they should be chaste?

Who, those who are not finding Nikka until Allah gives them off his bounty until Allah gives them off his Lena. So, oftentimes, we say that you know what marriage is a money hole that you're just going to drop money into. But in reality, Allah who will give you financial independence through that Nikka and this is just a side point.

But for those who cannot find Nika, just be chaste, and be patient. And that which will come afterwards will be amazing. So imagine the joy, the pleasure, the amazement that you receive from that, as opposed to a person who has done it in a haram manner. And they get to Nikka they already know it doesn't mean much to them. What value would you have for that Nika going into it?

Knowing that this is what I have. I've already experienced it. I already know what it is. And for those who are not chaste as well, you've trained yourself to get tired of the person in a short space of time. You're done with what you want from them. Well, now it's over. That's all I needed. I've got it and move on to the next. I guarantee him Jana and think about that is not easy.

It's not easy to guarantee that you will not say that which is wrong after that which is evil, immoral, curse and abuse. And in sha Allah your marriage will not only be successful, but you will value it much more, as opposed to those who don't actually abide by this. May Allah subhanahu wa taala get those who are single married. I mean, and may Allah bless that your journal make it easy for us to make it easy for them as well.

I mean, I mean, I mean, you're up. Salah Salem is telling you that if somebody comes with his deen is intact and good character and conduct and getting married, so the red flags would be the opposite of that. So somebody's deen is not in order. Somebody doesn't have good character and good conduct. Obviously, it's a red flag. Now we've also got to differentiate between people who are practicing.

Let's say that your compulsory acts of worship are in order after that people differ. And at the same time, we've got to realize and understand that people grow with time. So sometimes you find somebody has a bad habit, but it's something they want to work on something they, you know, making improvements on. So you've got to understand, you know, the whole thing of red flags, red flags, what is a red flag and what isn't a red flag.

Mashallah, firstly, try to be the person whom you want to marry. So if you're just going to be, I give you an example, yesterday, someone sent me an email to say, they were so interested in a guy and he just cut them off and they please make dua I really want to marry this guy. And so and I sent an a reply saying that you want a guy like him, but he doesn't want a person like you.

So all you have to do is develop yourself to a point where a person like that would actually want a person like you. You know, it's one of those those things, one of the brothers told me that I went to propose to someone, religious person really amazing, and so much more.